I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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