This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
