I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
