so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
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