No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
