the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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