I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I wish I only lived at night.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
