oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
