I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
