she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
