Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
