Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
