I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Holy shit dude........stairs
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
