you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
It was confusing and full of hummus
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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