i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
