I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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