ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
