My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
