chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
