No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
You can't motorboat a personality
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I love having hate sex.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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