handjob tips. give me some.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
