I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
