Where did you get a picture of my penis
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
