I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
