I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
NoShamevember. You game?
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
