Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
