everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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