that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
