2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
