i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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