I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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