I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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