I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I smell like Dick and happiness
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