are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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