i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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