He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
