I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
