so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
