yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
