evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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