By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
