I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
