soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize