There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
