Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I haven't been this sober since birth.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize
