so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She told me I should be a condom model.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
