who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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