Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
