By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
