Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize