So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Randomize
